Controlling sexual desire and masturbation

Aug 15, 2021 | Taharah (Purity)

Question

Assalamualaykum wa Rahmatullah wa Barakatuh
I am struggling to control my sexual desires. I know masturbation is wrong but can’t stop it totally. Mostly daydreaming about sex, meaning I get sexual images in my mind. I feel sometimes my sexual arousal and images happen automatically without I am doing anything. Sometimes it happens suddenly. Its so bad it even happens during the salah. Because of this I require ghusl, I am too lazy to have ghusl so I stop praying salah. Some days I am free from it this is when I do manage to pray salah. I try to fast here and there but I can’t do it always because of my health problems. I also don’t have option to get married because of my financial and health problems. I don’t watch porn but struggle to keep my gaze down. Could you please offer some religious advise? Can I continue praying if happens during salah?
Thank you.


Answer

There are two types of fluid that may be released due to sexual thoughts and masturbation. The first is pre-ejaculatory fluid (madhi). This fluid is usually a clear fluid and is released when a person becomes sexually aroused, but before they ejaculate. One sign of pre-ejaculatory fluid is that arousal does not subside after this fluid comes out. Wudu’ will become necessary if pre-ejaculatory fluids come out. Hence, if such fluids come out whilst praying salat you should either clean or change any clothes the fluid has come into contact with, redo wudu and pray your salat. 

The second fluid is semen (mani), which is a thick, white fluid that comes out at the time of ejaculation and most of the time is accompanied with an orgasm. One sign of the fluid being semen is that when it comes out, sexual arousal subsides or reduces. If mani come out during salat, ghusl will become necessary. In such a case you must perform ghusl and perform your salat. 

These thoughts should not stop you praying your salat. The more you remember Allah the Almighty through salat, du’a and dhikr, the more strength you will have to help you over come these challenges. Keep performing your salat and repent to Allah for the occasions where you have made a mistake. You should constantly make du’a to Allah to help you stop these acts.

On the positive side, you should thank Allah that you have not become habitual of watching pornography as this is a very difficult addiction to overcome. As you already have the strength to avoid this, insha Allah it will also be possible for you to overcome the challenges you are going through currently. We urge you not to give up and stay strong and steadfast.

As this maybe leading to some degree of addiction, we advise you to seek professional help as well from a counsellor or therapist.

Answered by:
Ifta Research Fellow

Checked & Approved by:
Mufti Abdul Rahman Mangera
Mufti Zubair Patel