Proposing To More Than One Woman

Sep 4, 2010 | Marriage and Divorce

Question

Questions about the Islamic etiquettes when a man sends a marriage proposal to a girl:

Is he allowed to send proposals to many girls at the same time?

If the marriage proposal has been accepted by one girl and discussions between families are proceeding, is it allowed for him and his family to proceed with a proposal and a marriage with another girl without telling the first girl?

Answered by: Mufti Abdurrahman ibn Yusuf

Assalamu alaykum

In the name of Allah the Inspirer of truth.

One should proceed carefully in this regard. It is not permissible to cause undue grief to another Muslim. Therefore, proposals should be made carefully.

Although it cannot be considered impermissible to propose to more than one girl at one time, however, since it could lead to many hurt feelings in the family and community, it would be discouraged.

In the case that a person has already proposed to one and discussions are on, thereafter another good opportunity come up, it would be permissible to make a second proposal as well. However, it would be a good idea to let the first know that there is another proposal.

Experience shows that the best course to follow when proposing to someone is to find out as much as possible about the person before actually proposing. This way there are less chances of rejections and broken hearts.

And Allah knows best.

Wassalam
Mufti Abdurrahman ibn Yusuf