Hanafi: I have strong desires, almost crippling, i want to do ‘istimna, I am aware is haram, is there a rule, which is HALAL, for me to follow/switch to, without fatwa shopping, or doing something haram. I can’t marry yet, and have quit Istimna for about 2 months so far.
The solution for controlling strong desires is not by masturbating. Masturbating will not only make your desires stronger over time as you will be constantly thinking about the desires. This will also negatively impact your faith as masturbating is a sin. You mention that you have quit masturbation for two months which is a very good start. We pray that Allah the Almighty gives your strength to abstain from masturbating from now on.
It seems that this has already become an addiction, therefore your primary focus at this moment in time must be on quitting masturbation altogether. Do not look towards this as an outlet for controlling strong desires as there are other permissible ways to control these desires, such as the following:
1. Stay away from those things that prompt and provoke sexual desire. This could be social media, movies, music, mixing with the opposite sex, staying awake at night, being alone etc.
2. Keep your gaze and thoughts pure.
3. Fast on a regular basis.
4. Focus on your diet. Some foods such as takeaways have a negative impact on a person. Try and adopt a more healthier diet.
5. Try to get married as soon as is possible and suitable.
Ifta Research Fellow
Checked & Approved by:
Mufti Abdul Rahman Mangera
Mufti Zubair Patel